technically, yesterday was a shitty day. (technically because it’s 4am.) 

i can’t walk to school without it taking me a good 20 mins and it was already 8:11am. so had to ask a family member to take me and then ended up late. the only good part about being late..is i finally interacted with the guy i labeled my ‘dream guy’ since i was in 7th grade. he really isn’t perfect personality wise but basically one look at him and you realize 10 seconds later that you’ve sucked in your breath.

he’s stunning. so i had never talked or walked near him or anything. the closest i’ve ever got to him was when i had been in the car waiting for someone and he walked by and stared at me. even then, i put my head down. so yesterday, i was walking up the pathway to get to school and he was using the steps on the other side and he stared at me right until he got to the door. 

i stared back but only because i thought he was someone i knew. (need glasses, but i never wear them to school so i’m practically blind.) he WAITED by the door, keeping it open until i came inside. that’s a miracle in this school. no guy ever holds the door open or even waits for them unless they’re friends. then i went to open the other door and he grabs the door quickly and lets me in again. 

i almost puked rainbows on the floor until i realized i was getting a late slip. -__- then i was pissed and slightly panicked. lol. but i swear, that was god telling me, “the rest of your day is gonna screw you up mentally but here’s something happy to screw up your mental state before you meet your impending doom.”  then i had gotten happy because my one of my old friends had finally began to act like a normal human being to me again. 

but in becca’s world, there is no such thing as being happy. she called me a fucking idiot. that was the first thing that pissed me off. she told off someone that i was going to talk to soon so i could sort things out with him. then at the end of the day, someone who hung out with here all week told me that she was making comments about me. supposedly i’m a bitch all the time and why the fuck can’t i get to school myself. now, i got to see her face tomorrow and i know already i’m gonna be sick to my stomach. it’s unbelievable.